Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Change of Seasons

I noticed a few of the leaves were turning yellow today which means the change of seasons is in the air. This is always a welcome change for me because I LOVE fall! Seeing these signs of nature, made me think of the variety of seasons in life for all of us.

I couldn't help but reflect on the phone call from my dad earlier this morning that mom has been admitted to the hospital again. With her condition seemingly getting worse over the past year, this could be an indication that I am entering another season in my own life... the leaves are changing. I suppose nothing really does stay the same forever and life unfolds in ways we usually don't expect.

Thinking about my mom today, I began to feel a little heavy with fear. "I'm not ready to be at a stage in my life yet where I watch my parents deteriorate.... In 20 yrs. from now I still don't think I'll be ready to handle such a challenge!" Needing some comfort, I recalled the scripture in Mormon that reads, "For do we not read that God is the asame byesterday, today, and forever, and in him there is no cvariableness neither shadow of changing?"

I remember sitting in a testimony meeting years ago and listening to a mother who just lost a baby at birth. I'm sure this was something she never imagined would happen to her. But through her tears she had not lost her faith. She stood confident and declared with boldness, "I don't know what the future holds...But I know Who holds the future." I've never forgotten that.

I take comfort in knowing that God will not leave us, He will help us through whatever life requires of us and give us strength to bear it. I believe with all my heart in the promise found in Isaiah "But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint."


sweetybird09 said...

This is a lovely heart felt post, I understand how you feel, as my Dad is getting more and more into his Alzheimer disease, the Dad that I knew is slipping away, my Mom cares for him and its so hard on her...I too am not ready for that new change of season, but we have to do what you said and that is to lean on the Lord and not our own understanding.

Take care...God Bless you as you go through all this with your Mom

Passionate Spirit said...

So true Alicia, I enjoyed reading this post this morning. Thank you for sharing!

RGG said...

You have more strength than you know.I am sorry about your mom, and I will pray for you and your family.
My mother passed away last year on Christmas. She had been chronically ill for a long time. So we both had to prepare ourselves for her eventual passing. She decided to live her life on her own terms. I suppose that she did.I think that the hardest part of my moms passing was not that she passed but the years of preparing for it. But,I know that our Heavenly Father prepares our hearts for this,specifically in Temple work.I believe that families can be together forever, and I bore this testimony to my mother. I told her not to worry, I would not forget her or forsake her.We do save our families. I told her that Heavenly Father loved her and not to get bogged down in what if, what she had not done. I told her to pray for that perfect peace that passes the natural understanding of man. I think that she did.
Take care of yourself,ask and it shall be given.

Alicia said...

@sweetybird09 & passionate spirit thank you for your lovely comments May the Lord bless you too!
And thanks Ramona, I too am so thankful for the Temple and for the understanding that families can be sealed for eternity and that we don't part forever at death. Like your mom, I think death won't be the hardest part for me but rather watching her deteriorate so slowly.
I think that is so wonderful you were able to share your testimony with your mom before she passed away. How wonderful for you to be able to do her work in the Temple!
I think I told you before that my mom is a convert and one of her greatest attributes I've always admired is her immense faith & trust in the Lord. I think the two of you would get along extremely well. :)

6L's said...

sending loving thoughts your way!!

Alicia said...

Thank you!